Chapter 15
That night, I fell asleep for the first time in a while.
Come to think of it, I haven’t slept at all since this time loop began. After all, everything resets the moment Shinji dies. In other words, this was the first time in a very long time that I could actually sleep.
—I was recalling a dream I had once.
No, maybe I was just dozing off and actually had a dream.
That was long ago.
Suddenly, I recalled a memory where I, just like now, seemed to have been tormented by a “repeating” nightmare.
It was strange to say “I think”, but anyway, I couldn’t tell if what I was remembering was real or if it was just a dream I was having right now, so there was nothing I could do about it.
Yes… Back then, too, something terrible had happened, and I struggled to do something about it.
A recurring tragedy.
I’m pretty sure… it was around the time I started elementary school.
Little by little, I’m piecing together my memories—
◇◇◇
“Hey, you can’t go over there.”
I was a child with a strong sense of justice…… I think. Largely due to my grandfather’s influence. That’s why I never did anything adults told me “not to do”. But that child, who was the same age as me, was different. I feel like she took the lead in doing exactly the things adults said were off-limits.
Looking back now, she seemed to have been raised by a single-parent, a somewhat neglectful mother. That’s why I think she might have done things she was told not to do on purpose, just to get her mother’s attention.
That day, I spotted her trying to enter a place she’d been told not to go, so I stopped her.
“What are you talking about? You’re just saying that because you’re scared of getting scolded, aren’t you?”
When I stopped her, she glared at me and said in a mocking tone,
“No one lives in this house. So even if I go in, no one will find out.”
She said.
Ah, that’s right.
That place was the neighborhood’s infamous haunted house. The curtains were always closed, but you could sense people inside. The yard was littered with trash, and the windows were broken.
“Are you scared of ghosts? Come on. Let’s go check it out together and see if there really are any.”
She yanked my hand, but I shook my head.
“No! We can’t just barge into someone’s house.”
“It’s fine! Look!”
She pulled me along, and before I knew it, I had stepped into the yard.
The yard was overgrown with weeds, and trash—appliances, plastic bottles, and the like—was scattered everywhere. It was impossible to tell if the trash had been thrown in from outside or if it belonged to the homeowner.
“…… Hey, let’s go home, okay?
I desperately tried to pull her back. But she wouldn’t listen to me at all, and I was practically dragged further and further inside.
Just as we reached the veranda, the door suddenly swung open. Standing there was a middle-aged man. His face was flushed—probably from drinking. And the look in his eyes as he saw us was filled with rage.
“Hi!”
Neither of us had expected anyone to come out, so we froze in shock. The man looked at us and said something. …Yes, I’m pretty sure it was,
“Trespassing, huh?”
I think that’s what he said.
What happened next was truly terrifying. The man reached out toward us, who were frozen in place. First, he grabbed her arm and pushed her down. Then, without hesitation, he straddled her and began choking her.
Unable to make a sound, she thrashed her arms and legs. All the while, I couldn’t escape and could only watch her suffer in silence. After a while, her movements grew weaker, and eventually, they stopped.
“You’re next.”
The moment the man said that and reached out his hand to me, the scene suddenly changed.
◇
“What are you talking about? You’re just saying that because you’re scared of getting scolded, aren’t you?”
The girl who had just been choked by the man and stopped moving was standing right in front of me.
I didn’t understand what was happening, but I was so terrified that I walked away from the scene. It would be more accurate to say I ran away.
But before I could make it home, for some reason everything went pitch black. When I came to, there she was again,
“What are you talking about? You’re just saying that because you’re scared of getting scolded, aren’t you?”
She said that.
I didn’t understand what was going on. But instinctively, I dragged her away from there. She complained as I forcefully pulled her arm, but I didn’t care. We just couldn’t stay there. That much I knew.
“Hey, what’s going on? Why are you pulling me!”
“We can’t stay there! There’s a man inside. If he finds us, he’ll kill us!”
I explained it to her over and over. Of course, she wouldn’t listen.
Still, the day passed without incident. After all, we both went home and were able to wake up to a normal morning.
But …….
The next day, she must have gone to that house alone. And she was probably killed.
That’s why I ended up having to start over from that moment again.
“What are you talking about? You’re just saying that because you’re scared of getting scolded, aren’t you?”
From there, it was the same thing over and over again. I tried everything to persuade her, but she wouldn’t listen. I even tried asking an adult for help, but even if I managed to get through that moment, she’d end up sneaking into that house anyway, and each time, I’d be forced to start over.
“Mom! What am I supposed to do? How can I save that child?”
I still remember the look of surprise on my mother’s face when she saw me suddenly burst into tears.
But…… was this a dream I had? Or was it real?
If that incident really happened, how was it resolved? If I could figure that out, maybe I could break free from this loop.
Back then….
I think about it with my eyes closed.
What was that girl’s name again?
How much of this is real? Is this just a dream I’m having right now, trapped in a loop?
“Shinji-kun……”
I call his name.
I want to save him.
I want to stop this recurring tragedy.
I want to stop it—
Sads Translates 